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Lighten Up: Weight Bashing.

Warning: This Lighten Up Thursday is so high up on the passion ladder that it may offend some close minded, judgmental people but I don’t care. Prepare for me to get completely real. Today’s Lighten Up Thursday discusses the big, bad W. Weight. 

The Story

In my family, I was always viewed as unhealthy for not having a “normal” petite. I eat like a bird but not on purpose and not all the time. It’s just the way I am. Family members have always expressed worry and suggested that I get tested for anorexia or bulimia. It bothered me so much that I stayed in my bedroom for family events and did my best to avoid any and all family events that involved food. Being raised in a family where being called “Fat” was an insult, I desperately craved answers to why it was completely okay to call me “unhealthy” in regards to the weight I physically couldn’t gain despite my best efforts to eat more.

I finally gave up and consulted my doctor who {thankfully} is also a therapist. I won’t say I “cried” to her but I mean… Okay, I cried. What’s wrong with me? Why do I have to be the unhealthy one just because I don’t eat as much as everyone else? I eat until I’m full! Why is it only a crime when I do it? On and on I rambled until my doctor put her hand up to tell me to stop. She said that it sounded to her like I was suffering from a case of judge-itis, and unfortunately there was only one cure.

She wrote me a prescription that only had two words: Self appreciation. 

What is “Judge-itis” and What Does It Have To Do with My Weight?

The most talked about picture I’ve ever posted was the hardest one I ever had to take. It was when I made the decision to take my doctor’s advice and refuse to let anyone’s negative comments dictate my comfort level with my own body. I made a day out of it, setting up my tripod and my camera. Slowly, I began to shed layers of clothes one by one in front of my camera which was slightly taboo for me. I was determined to create the image of appreciation. I turned on “Private Party” by Indie Arie blast as I danced around and loosened up. Finally, I achieved it. The feeling of self confidence.

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Family and friends alike were so quick to point at me and add commentary. “How could you, Jasemine? Respect yourself! Why would you post YOU NAKED ON THE INTERNET?” Judge…itis.

The photo was me giving myself the utmost respect and sharing it among those who I felt I could trust to understand. This is not ego or vanity, I’m just celebrating me. The photo was my way of shedding my insecurities and being happy with myself despite all hate campaigns advertising things like “Say no to zero.” Since when was it okay for someone to judge me for feeling confident with myself?

Oh wait. Since weight was something that became a defining factor in attraction regardless of which side of the scale. Since judge-itis became popular on a global scale.

Truth Is, I’m 100 lbs, 4’11, at 22 and Sometimes You Can See My Bones.

I work out to stay toned but trust and believe that when the time comes, I can eat an entire Thanksgiving Dinner in one sitting and not gain a pound. It’s both a blessing and a curse. I’m sick of being called unhealthy because it’s just as BAD AND WRONG as being called fat. It hurts!

One of my best friends is the most gorgeous and snuggly plus sized models I’ve ever seen. She’s drop dead gorgeous and “fat” has never been an adjective that came to mind when I look at her. Individually, we receive a lot of weight bashing. She’s too big and I’m too small but together we are perfect in our own accord because we carry ourselves confidently as any woman should! ANY WOMAN. 

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Lighten Up, Because I’m Not Just Saying Don’t Wash Bash Skinny People, I’m Saying Don’t Weight Bash all People.

Regardless of what side of the scale you’re on, judge-itis can kill. There are just as many gorgeous girls killing themselves for being talked about because of how skinny they are than there are starving themselves because they’re being called fat. Plainly put, there shouldn’t be a single woman anywhere ashamed of the skin she’s in.

When will the world wake up and learn that we were all created in the likeness of beauty regardless of religious belief? Stop being the person responsible for stealing a woman’s joy. (I don’t care how much or little she may weigh.)

Maybe one day a naked back won’t be so easily judged because people will be comfortable enough in their own skin to stop trying to get under someone else’s. Remember that the change begins with you.

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